“Show the readers everything, tell them nothing.”
― Ernest Hemingway
This quote from Hemingway takes the concept to the extreme, and a memoir needs to contain both SHOW and TELL, but we can bring our memoir to life and get your readers to have a stake in the story, by relying on the SHOW technique.
Show pulls our readers into our scenes to participate in our lives, but when we Tell them about the scene, they’re relegated to an observer. This is because Telling provides all the detail and readers don’t have to interpret what’s being written, they just have to read it.
SHOW = Participate
TELL = Observer
When we Show it helps our characters jump off the page, and helps our readers make an emotional connection to them; to us as the main protagonist; and to our story.
As soon as we get readers to work for the story, they start to experience events, actions, and emotions first hand. They start internalizing the events we Show them. They tie them to similar events in their own life in order to understand and comprehend them. When then do this—they’re hooked into the outcome of your story.
SHOW vs. TELL examples
TELL
There was a bad storm outside and the rain was making a lot of noise. I walked over to the window and stared outside into the darkness. I knew the storm was directly overhead because the lightening and thunder weren’t very far apart.
SHOW
I gazed out the window. The sound of the rain was momentarily overshadowed by a roll of thunder, just as a flash of lightening lit up the sky.
A reader’s thought process: Oh the thunder and lightening is happening at the same time so the storm must be directly overhead. I’ve looked out of a window during a storm when that happens. I (love/hate) watching storms.
TELL
It was cold outside, so I put on a thick coat, a scarf and some gloves before I stepped out the door. The wind was really biting, and I was worried that my eyes would water and my mascara would run.
SHOW
I wrestled my collar over my scarf as I closed the door. Even before I’d taken a step, I shoved my hands deep into my pockets and lowered my head so that the wind didn’t make my mascara run.
A reader’s thought process: Why would the mascara run. Oh, when the wind is so cold and biting, it makes your eyes water. I’ve had that happen and it’s a nightmare. She should have worn waterproof mascara!
TELL
“Did you sleep ok last night?” he asked.
“No not at all” I said “The pillows were really uncomfortable and it’s making me really moody”.
SHOW
Climbing out of bed, I rocked my neck from shoulder to shoulder before slumping back down and stifling a yawn.
“Bad night’s sleep?” he asked.
I just glared.
A reader’s thought process: Why does their neck hurt? Oh I’ve had that because of the pillows/mattress/bed isn’t very comfortable. When this happened to me I was really moody and I didn’t have a good night’s sleep. When you leave some of the scene open to interpretation it means your reader can relate to it more easily, because they have the opportunity of applying whatever scenario best fits their own experiences.
Homework
Writing these different examples from scratch has really helped to make the SHOW vs. TELL approach sink it. So I’m going to carry on practicing with the following simple examples. Why don’t you join me?
- The soup tasted bitter.
- My trousers were too tight because I’d eaten too much.
- That other car driver really annoyed me and I got road rage.
- I’m sad whenever my brother tells me this.
- This flower always reminds me of my Mum.
- Traffic was really bad and I had to get to the hospital as quickly as I could.
Next Steps
So what are the next steps for my memoir? I can learn so much from reading well-written memoirs, and I’m going to evaluate the words being used to share a story. Are they TELLING me or are they SHOWING me? I want to be able to identify when I’m being shown, so that I can incorporate more of the SHOW and less of the TELL in my memoir.
If you’re on the same path, and want to write your memoir and are looking for some inspiration (or can provide some inspiration), please join in the conversation in the comments section below and lets get our memoirs written.
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